Giving up on my dreams...

“Everything I need, I already have."

I'm giving up on my dreams...

7 years ago, I went through a serious bout of Postpartum Depression that rocked my world... my joy was taken from me and I didn't know why. Things that used to make me happy just didn't anymore. Until I got help and made changes - I went headlong into personal development, mental health, and healthy habits. During that time, I was also raising my 4 kids with my husband, growing a business, paying off debt, saving money, building a house, planning for retirement, and on and on and on...

I'M DONE!

Overcoming PPD was one of the greatest accomplishments of my life and something I'll be forever grateful for. However, it pushed me to do better and be better and better and better until... I think I've gone too far. The hustling, going, and doing I've done constantly for the past 7 years has taught me something... happiness isn't something you chase. I've been endlessly chasing "the next big thing" that was supposed to make me happy for years and I've reached some of the goals and missed some of those goals, only to discover nothing much has changed. I still have dreams I haven't reached, goals I haven't achieved and things I haven't done... If my happiness is predicated on some endless list of future dreams, I'll never be happy.

I'M DONE!

Today, I'm letting it all go. The chasing. The hustling. The constantly looking for the next habit, the next business, the next opportunity... the things that are going to make me feel successful and happy... stick a fork in me, because

I'M DONE!

This is my Year of Here: using what I have to be happy in the present.

*Disclaimer: I know I am blessed beyond measure! My experience is my own. If I have FAR different goals or aspirations than you, great! If my "problems" seem outlandish or ungrateful to you, that's ok. We're different people. I respect that my goals are not your goals, my life is not your life, and my struggles are not your struggles. The point of this blog is not to say I'm better than or less than anyone else... I'm just me and I'm sharing my experience in case it's inspiring, helpful or even just flat out entertaining for you.

So here we go. I'm embarking on a 1 year journey to be happy here. I'll record my experiences here on this blog for the next 52 weeks. I want to be fully present and content with exactly what and who I have. Everything I need, I already have.